Lonely Vs Alone Vs A Loner....

I am extremely comfortable with my own company. I prefer it to being with most people. Too comfortable sometimes. Sorry. Hell is other people. You know who you are....

The nooks and crannies in my mind. The scars and aches in my body. I know like the back of my hand. 

My strengths and weaknesses. Likes and dislikes. No need to compromise. No need to do what I don't want to do. 

I'm very comfortable in my self. Although a very sociable person, I'm still a loner at heart.

And I never feel lonely. I socialize with others. I love the company of others. Finding out what makes people tick is what I do for a living. But outside of work its still only an occasional distraction from my own company. 

I like the things that I do. Being at one with nature on a mountain top, or underwater, SCUBA diving. Reading books. Watching movies. Listening to music. Looking for music I like, in a store. 

I drive, but I prefer walking. The journey from A to B, is the pleasure. Getting to B is incidental. I see more. I hear more. I feel more. On my own. Without the interference and distraction caused by someone else. Out of synch with my individual rhythm. I also walk faster than most people.

I experience more on my own. I meet more people on my own. I get inside of people's mind better, when I'm on my own, asking them questions over coffee, beer or wine.

And then I meet you.  

You make this loner feel very alone. Very lonely. Knowing what I am missing. Knowing what we, could have. Knowing what I want. 

I'm lonely.

Have you ever....

Have you ever been somewhere that feels familiar. But you've never been there before.

Have you ever heard words come out of someone's mouth, that you swear you have heard before, or even said yourself.

Have you ever smelled or tasted something, remembering it from the last time? But its your first time. Ever.

Have you ever been in a situation. A relationship. That you feel you were destined for. But you feel have already lived parts of it before.

Have you ever looked into someone's eyes and blinked. And they blinked back.

Your past. Your future. Your present. 

All fused into one insane moment.

Have you ever met that person? 

If you have....keep them. Forever.

An Education: 30 years of the RHCP in 11 tracks

Click here for the full rundown.....

Another hostage

Praying for you John Cantlie...

Decoding tattoos: wow!

From the 1960s to the 1980s, Arkady Bronnikov visited correctional facilities all over the Soviet Union and photographed thousands of tattooed inmates to decode their body art – and helped solve many crimes by identifying criminals based on their ink. 

You can learn what roses, snakes and cowboys really mean …

Click here

September Ghost...a tardy reply

I do not want you to tell me how you feel.

You're there, balancing me, like a keel.

You do not have to tell me it will be alright.

Because you are there for me, day and night.

Fast asleep or wide awake, still battling my demon.

Together in the storm, like seamen.

You do not know what to do, or what to say.

But still you are there, because I pray.

Among the stars shining bright.

Guiding me there with your light.

Brightening my journey along the way.

To some place I am meant to play.

Somewhere I will eventually lay.

Together. We will never sway.

It kills me. Waiting. For that day.

(ADL)

TBH

I leave for Japan. Again. Early tomorrow morning on assignment.

Its my second time in as many months. Although this time I'm off to Tokyo. The past two months have seemed like an eternity. But in a good way.

Good things always come in threes for me. Always. Without fail. Thank you God:

1./ I have moved home to a better place for my daughter. 

Cooler, brighter, and more spacious, my mind feels open and relaxed. It is the perfect brainstorming and thinking space. Story ideas are coming out of nowhere on a daily basis. As is my will to write them.

2./ This blog that I only started on July 7th has been so therapeutic. Its like having my old diary again. Except that I am not nine years-old. And it is not private. 

Well, my deepest thoughts remain so, shared only with a select few.  Sometimes I'm not sure what they mean, or perhaps just too shy to really admit what they mean. I'm sure you really know what this means  V**inyl Monologue

But writing about your feelings and emotions is good to see in front of you. On the screen in black and white. Like lists.  Draw them up. Break it down. Manage and deal with them better. I'm not into horoscopes, but I appear to be a stereotypical Virgo down to a tee....

3./ I may have established the beginnings of a nerdy relationship with a new friend. And I love it. Books. Music. Movies. Thoughts. Random ones. A love of dogs, like kids. 

Its weird. And I love it.  I'm uncertain where this is going, or where I want it to go, but my mind loves it. And I don't want to lose it.

Exchanging and bouncing off each others brains. Story ideas for one another. Stupid stuff. Good stuff. Fun stuff.

They agree that "we are probably twins". I'm not sure what that means. I'm not sure what type of twins. But luckily for them, not identical twins, as thanks to God they appear to have received generous helpings of both brains and beauty.

Twin flames, I don't know. Who believes in that stuff? It freaks me out. Big time. Too New Age, spiritual and dreamy. Down-to-earth earth signs tend to just get on with life. As I have done for 46 years. 

But what if?

If there was ever an unusual meeting of minds during my  lifetime, this is it.

Nothing haunts us as things we don't say, or could have said, but don't, said some wordy man. With nothing to lose...there... I've said it.

To Be Honest is something I have vowed to be since I was old enough. TBH. That is all...

And I'm so sorry if this blog posting has ruined it.

Never. Ever .Quit.