The Bottom Line: Class Ass

Young and old. Saggy and perky. Sunbaked and sunburnt.

I get to see the latest swimwear fashions covering (or not) all shapes and variety of flesh, at my condo swimming pool, holidaying at a resort, or lounging by the beach.  

Nowadays (am I getting old?) nothing is left to the imagination, so streamlined and minimalist are current designs. Spilling forth what God has blessed some of us with.

"Tough world," I can hear some of you folks say.

But do we really need to see all of you, hanging over the edges like that, about to burst forth? 

Nothing is left to the imagination.

Topless and very perky, some women wonder why they attract stares and gawking from us local residents.  

The guys are worse. Banana hammocks, or slingshots, are a big no-no and should not be permitted outside the confines of swim competitions.

We don't even know you. Yet you present to all and sundry your crown jewels wrapped in the latest Speedo fashion.

Our teutonic and Ruski friends are the worse offenders, shameless in their displays of packaged burritos. Its indecent.

I have spent 35 years in this part of the world. And it never ceases to amaze me when women, and increasingly, men, flaunt it so unsubtly.

Less is more. Less flesh on display and let me eat my lunch comfortably. Without vomiting.

Go ahead and flaunt it. But less flesh on display is definitely the way forward.  Be subtle. Be discrete.

Display a class ass.  Its not about religion or race. Its about staying classy.

Read this article on sixties swimwear fashion here

Travellers Tale: Be Kind This Year

Travel isn’t about landmarks, shopping and souvenirs. It is about meeting people. Connecting with them. And sharing kindness, writes Andrew Drummond Law.

I meet new people every year. At work, through my social circle, and on my travels.

Some of us connect with so many new friends on social media we have hundreds, perhaps thousands of friends.

Robin Dunbar, a famous anthropologist and psychologist, found that the average maximum number of people that our brain can handle is a social group of 150. Relationships involving trust and obligation, where you still have that personal touch, and you are not just another profile picture and username.

Of these, 50 are close enough to invite home for dinner, but only 15 are your inner circle, with whom you can confide and turn to for sympathy. Five is your close support group of best friends, often your family members.

Sorry to all you social media addicts that claim to have 500+ “friends”. The big news is…you do not.

When traveling you meet random people in passing, either just to smile at, talk briefly, or share transportation with. Sometimes there’s a moment of need and a brief moment where you can choose to stop and help, or walk on past them. A connection can be made, ignored, or missed too easily. Open your eyes and ears.

There is nothing new about being kind and generous to strangers on your travels.

But it is becoming less common, as we insulate ourselves from our physical surroundings with technology, using our smartphone and its online reviews, rather than make conversation with strangers, asking for directions and opinions on places to eat, visit and shop.

Here are some suggestions and thoughts that are guaranteed to not only make you feel like a kind human being again, but will also help someone this year:

Compliment a complete stranger while on your travels. Say something nice, smile or wink at them. You’d be surprised how breaking the ice this way can sometimes lead to an invitation, or friendship of a lifetime. Travel is very stressful for some people. Make it enjoyable for them.

Look for opportunities where you can help someone. When boarding your flight, help that aunty with her heavy cabin bag, and lift it for her into the overhead locker. You too will be old and shorter one day, and also carrying double your permitted weight limit in your carry-on bag.

While waiting in transit at KLIA and KLIA2 airports, twice, in as many months, I have encountered foreign tourists needing local currency to buy a drink or meal.

With a very short stopover time and unfamiliar airport, it is not always easy to change money. So buy them that fast-food they crave, cup of coffee, or sugar filled chocolate bar that their poor jetlagged stomachs are crying out for. Help feed them.

Catching a bus from Madrid to London I met a guy who claimed to have lost his wallet. I paid for his bus fare home to the UK. He promised he would pay me back. The other passengers quietly suggested to me he was a conman. Maybe he was. But I helped him, and they didn’t. He never paid me back. I still believe he was genuine.

Until recently, I always ignored the postcard sellers on my travels. They would chase me down the street, harassing me as I explored local landmarks. I considered them a nuisance. I would argue with them. I didn’t want to buy from them, as I could take my own good photographs.

Now I realise the error of my ways. Maybe I did not want to buy the postcards for myself. But I should have bought them from the young children selling them. And shared the postcards with my friends and family members as souvenirs.

They are just trying to earn a living. Me spending five dollars on postcards has a far greater impact on their lives, than me saving five dollars.

This year I am making a concerted point to be kind to people I meet on my travels, because what goes around comes around. Kindness. Pay it forward for 2015. And if someone winks at you, it’s probably me.

BBC article: Post-It notes

Her husband was killed by terrorists. A very, very moving article.

Click to see the article here

Travellers Tale: Going Down Safely

With the tail end of monsoon season approaching, Andrew Drummond Law prepares for the East Coast SCUBA diving season.

It is an exciting feeling of anticipation and impatience that I’m feeling.

Monsoon will soon come to an end and the Peninsula’s East Coast SCUBA season begins.

The most popular destinations for Malaysia’s divers are Pulau Tioman, Perhentian, Redang and Lang Tengah.

Driving to the Mersing and Merang boat jetties from Kuala Lumpur on a Friday night, or very early Saturday morning, is the beginning of your typical East Coast dive trip.

After a 45-minute boat ride to your resort, within the hour you can be exploring Malaysia’s underwater treasures.

A good dive trip is all about planning, preparation, and safety.

I usually begin the season by dusting off my full-length neoprene wetsuit, checking it still fits, after all the excesses of Christmas and Chinese New Year.  

If it is too tight, I’ll have problems donning it, and it probably means I’m out of shape.

Next I ensure all my kit has been serviced properly. My buoyancy compensator (BC) dive jacket must be checked and serviced by a qualified technician from my local dive store.

The BC helps keep me afloat on the surface before and after the dive. It also helps me attain neutral buoyancy when underwater.

The deeper you go, the more you must inflate it with air, preventing you from plummeting to the sea bed, as the greater pressure makes you sink like a stone.

Next is the SCUBA regulator set, with the high-pressure valve and two hoses that are attached to the air tank. Rubber mouthpieces must be replaced, O-rings checked and greased. And your depth and air supply gauges tested.

Your fins and facemask must all be in good functioning order, and checked for broken straps.

Finally, check the battery and functionality of your dive computer; essential safety kit if you are doing multiple dives for consecutive days.

It calculates for you the length of the surface interval period between your different dives, reducing the likelihood of decompression sickness.

This year is very special for me. I haven’t dived for nearly four years.

Following a major lung operation, my level of physical fitness and stamina went south. And I gained ten kilos in weight.

I have a seven-inch long scar on my side where the surgeon operated on my right lung from behind. A middle and entire lower section of my lung were removed.

Post-surgery I was unable to even lift my right arm above shoulder height for nearly a year, and could not walk normally for nearly five months.

Regaining dive fitness and my self-confidence has been a real struggle. Knowing that our lungs are compressed and then expanded by the changes in pressure when diving, how will my smaller, scarred, right lung cope?

A high level of cardio-vascular fitness is key to safe diving. If you become out of breath quickly, you will use up your air supply faster, and at depth, could be in real danger. Look after your heart.

Upper body strength is another necessity when you are carrying ten to 12 kilos of equipment on your body, including your BC jacket and air tank on your back.

I won’t try too many dives.  It has been a very long recovery period, but I have managed to lose seven of the ten kilos I gained the past three years, and improved my fitness level considerably.

A refresher course to brush up on my dive skills set will also be necessary. Essential safety gear is the final box to tick on my must-do list.

A torch, to illuminate nature’s underwater beauty, but also to help signal my location to the boatman during poor light conditions.

A brightly coloured safety sausage will signal my location when underwater doing my safety stop, and the boatman can follow my location, despite the sea’s currents.  And a loud whistle is key, alerting your pickup boat to your location in low visibility situations.

Service your dive gear. Make sure you’re fit to dive. And carry the right safety gear. All are critical preparation to enjoying this year’s east coast dive season. Safely.