I am extremely comfortable with my own company. I prefer it to being with most people. Too comfortable sometimes. Sorry. Hell is other people. You know who you are....
The nooks and crannies in my mind. The scars and aches in my body. I know like the back of my hand.
My strengths and weaknesses. Likes and dislikes. No need to compromise. No need to do what I don't want to do.
I'm very comfortable in my self. Although a very sociable person, I'm still a loner at heart.
And I never feel lonely. I socialize with others. I love the company of others. Finding out what makes people tick is what I do for a living. But outside of work its still only an occasional distraction from my own company.
I like the things that I do. Being at one with nature on a mountain top, or underwater, SCUBA diving. Reading books. Watching movies. Listening to music. Looking for music I like, in a store.
I drive, but I prefer walking. The journey from A to B, is the pleasure. Getting to B is incidental. I see more. I hear more. I feel more. On my own. Without the interference and distraction caused by someone else. Out of synch with my individual rhythm. I also walk faster than most people.
I experience more on my own. I meet more people on my own. I get inside of people's mind better, when I'm on my own, asking them questions over coffee, beer or wine.
And then I meet you.
You make this loner feel very alone. Very lonely. Knowing what I am missing. Knowing what we, could have. Knowing what I want.
I'm lonely.
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